Of late, you can't swing a dead cat on the Internet without hitting a quiz that promises to tell you, based on a series of questions loosely based on personality, which Beatle you are, or which M*A*S*H character or member of boy band One Direction, or even which cultural decade or strain of modern art or flavor of steak sauce.
We'll leave aside the bizarreness of being told which form of pop culture you "are" -- as opposed to which you like, or most identify with -- as that's part of the addictive genius of the whole thing: Buzzfeed and Zimbio and other regular perpetrators of these time-sucks aren't just telling you what type of TV cop show you like (that wouldn't be a quiz, it would be a question), but what that says about you -- if you "are" NYPD Blue, you're a no-nonsense type who'll do whatever it takes to get the job done, but if you "are" Murder She Wrote, you're modest and self-effacing, but with hidden depths of insight and a keen eye for the foibles of humanity, and so on.
Now, we all like things that say things about us, particularly when those things tell us that we're thoughtful or decisive or other positive things, so these quizzes are hugely popular. And because an Internet quiz told me I'm a Plagiarist ("You have a deep appreciation for the work of others"), I've decided to offer up a little quiz here to help you identify which current TV show your firm is.
As with most of the online quizzes, no individual answer will be a perfect fit -- you'll just to pick the one that's closest:
- Is your firm struggling to find direction and a safe niche to occupy, even as you regularly lose qualified staff in a landscape filled with vicious competitors? Then your firm might be ... The Walking Dead.
- Is your firm proud of how smoothly it functions, but you're struggling to attract and retain successors, and find yourself clinging to the processes and practices of a bygone age even as they are rapidly being swept away? Then your firm might be ... Downton Abbey.
- Is your firm dependent on one brilliant rainmaker and founder who keeps all the data to himself, and whose methods are tremendously successful, but utterly baffling to the rest of you? Then your firm might be ... Sherlock (or Elementary, if you don't mind the tattoos and drugs).
- Is your firm a collection of rugged individualists out to make the most for themselves, and thus unable to focus on the looming existential threats that are emerging? Then your firm might be ... Game of Thrones.
- Is your firm full of young tech savants who are brilliant at the thing they focus narrowly on, but maybe not so great at "soft skills" -- and with a significant experience deficit when it comes to old-fashioned things like building long-term relationships? Then your firm might be ... The Big Bang Theory.
- Is your firm so desperate to hook up with another that you'll engage in increasingly intrusive and embarrassing ritutals? Then your firm might be ... The Bachelor.
- Does your firm embrace technology, change and diversity; enable strong leadership to create and implement a strategic plan; empower and develop staff so they want to join in the mission; and offer clients new, more valuable offerings and great service? Then your firm might be ... really lucky.
There's no TV show that fits that last one -- it doesn't generate enough drama.
